Sexual Harassment Past and Present

Last week we had a learning session about the story of Dinah and how she was sexually violated by Shechem.  This week’s story in the Torah introduces us to the narrative about Joseph, an arrogant 17 year old teenager who tells tales about his brothers, infuriates them with his behavior, and is thrown into a pit and sold into slavery.  Parshat Vayeshev also lets us see a different side of Joseph once he gets to Egypt.  In time, he becomes known in Jewish tradition as Yosef HaTzaddik, Joseph the tzadik, but how and when did that designation come to be his? (THANK YOU RABBI ALEX ISRAEL OF PARDES FOR YOUR MATERIALS THAT LAY THE BASIS FOR THE DISCUSSION).

According to the Talmud, “it was a result of Joseph’s principled resistance to the temptation of Potiphar’s wife:

It was told of Joseph the virtuous (Yoseph Hatzaddik) that the wife of Potiphar every day endeavored to entice him with words — The garments she put on for him in the morning, she did not wear in the evening, those she had put on in the evening, she did not wear in the morning.

 She said to him: Yield to me! He said: No.

 She said: I shall have you imprisoned. He said: The Lord releases the bound.

She said: I shall bend thy proud stature.

He replied: The Lord raises those who are bowed down.

She said: I shall blind your eyes. He replied: The Lord opens the eyes of the blind.

She offered him a thousand talents of silver to make him yield to her, to lie with her, to be near her, but he would not listen to her. (Yoma 35a)

That was the Talmudic explanation….now let’s look at the scene in the Torah.

READ ALOUD:

And it came to pass after these things, that his master's wife cast her eyes upon Joseph and she said, 'Lie with me.' But he refused [va-yema'en] and said unto his master's wife: 'Behold, my master has no concern about anything in the house, and he has put everything that he has in my charge… he has kept nothing from me except you, because you are his wife. . . How can I do this great wickedness, and sin against God?

 And it came to pass, as she spoke to Joseph day after day, that he hearkened not unto her, to lie by her or to be with her.

 And it came to pass on a certain day, when he went into the house to do his work, and there was none of the men of the house there within, that she caught him by his garment, saying: 'Lie with me.' And he left his garment in her hand and fled outside. (Gen. 39:7-12)

The phrase and it came to pass refers to 3 different scenes.

In the first instance, we see Joseph’s lengthy refusal.

In the second segment, we see that Potiphar’s wife’s seductions became a daily occurrence, a persistent pressure, and we witness Joseph’s firm distance from this woman.

 In the third segment, we witness that the house was empty, and this is the scene where things come to a breaking-point.

Let’s look at each scene:

Scene 1:  In the first “scene” note how lengthy Joseph’s statement is! Is he being polite, trying to explain to his mistress why he cannot comply, or is he possibly struggling with this enticement, with the temptation? After all, if he wished to refuse, he could simply have said a single word - “No!” In fact, there is an initial refusal - “But he refused [va-yema'en]” - BEFORE this long response. The trope on this word is the shalshelet, a wavering note, “the music of ambivalence”i which eloquently expresses Joseph’s inner turbulence. Joseph is severely tempted, but he refuses. And only afterwards he clarifies his moral thinking, beautifully articulating his moral stand. This wordy answer offers a window into Joseph’s soul as he clarifies his own inner thinking, clearly rebuffing his mistress’s sexual advances on moral and religious grounds.

WHAT ARE THE MORAL GROUNDS OF HIS REFUSAL?

WAS HIS LENGTHY REPLY FOR HER BENEFIT OR FOR HIS OWN BENEFIT?

HOW IS  SINNING  AGAINST ONE’S FELLOW MAN A SIN AGAINST G-D?

Scene 2: In the second scene, Potiphar’s wife persists. It is difficult to conceive of the pressure that she applied “day by day.” But now, Joseph is resolute - “he hearkened not unto her” - he simply avoids her, ignores her. He won’t even “be with her,” in other words, he makes sure that he is never alone in her presence nor does he engage her in private conversation. This state of affairs continues for some time.

IS THIS A GOOD STRATEGY?

IF YOU WERE GIVING ADVICE TO YOUR 17 YEAR OLD ABOUT A SIMILAR SITUATION, WHAT WOULD YOU TELL YOUR 17 YEAR OLD TO DO?

Scene 3: Until the third scene: On this day, “when he went into the house to do his work, and there was none of the men of the house,” Joseph and Potiphar’s wife are alone in the house. How did this state of affairs transpire?

Two ways of looking at “he went into the house to do his work”…. Rav and Shmuel [differ in their interpretation]. One said that it really means to do his work; but the other said that he went to satisfy his desires. (Yoma 36b)

Two Talmudic sages debate this verse.

Rav says that Joseph went to do his ordinary work, but this time, Potiphar’s wife had him all alone. He was trapped.

Shmuel disagrees. Why was Joseph allowing himself to “be with her” in an empty house? Now! Today, Joseph had crumbled under the pressure; it was all too much, and knowing that they were alone, he intended to acquiesce to her seductions.

Both sages have strong proof in the text. For Rav: “she caught him by his garment”; for Shmuel: “he left his garment in her hand.” We can well imagine that maybe there is truth in both opinions.

DOES IT MATTER THAT JOSEPH IS A SLAVE AND THAT POTIPHAR’S WIFE IS HIS OWNER? HOW DOES THAT RELATIONSHIP IMPACT THE STORY?

QUESTIONS FROM RABBI ALEX ISRAEL:

What are the ways to avoid sexually compromising situations? (Joseph ensured that he was never alone with his seductress)

 · Do people in power sometimes abuse that power?

· For ourselves too, as adults, we too must be aware that sexuality and sexual temptation are a real part of the world, and to ensure proper protocols to avoid temptation, misunderstanding and the like, and ensure that our language and conduct secure a safe environment at work and at leisure, so that we do not sin, neither to our fellow, nor to God.

DEFINE SEXUAL HARRASSMENT

harassment (typically of a woman) in a workplace, or other professional or social situation, involving the making of unwanted sexual advances or obscene remarks.

In our modern day contexts we often think of women being the subjects of sexual harassment.

EEOC:  Unwelcome sexual advances, requests for sexual favors, and other verbal or physical conduct of a sexual nature when: · Submission to such conduct is made either explicitly or implicitly a term or condition of an individual's employment, or

· Submission to or rejection of such conduct by an individual is used as a basis for employment decisions affecting such individual, or

· Such conduct has the purpose or effect of unreasonably interfering with an individual's work performance or creating an intimidating, hostile, or offensive working environment.

Unwelcome Behavior is the critical word. Unwelcome does not mean "involuntary." A victim may consent or agree to certain conduct and actively participate in it even though it is offensive and objectionable. Therefore, sexual conduct is unwelcome whenever the person subjected to it considers it unwelcome. Whether the person in fact welcomed a request for a date, sex-oriented comment, or joke depends on all the circumstances.

QUID PRO QUO HARASSMENT is when employment and/or employment decisions for an employee are based on that employees's acceptance or rejection of unwelcome sexual behavior. For example, a supervisor fires an employee because that employee will not go out with him or her.