Hesped for Max Neiden, z'l

Our sages tell us that there are two kinds of tears that are shed when hearing that an individual has died.  One is D’ma-ot shel ashan, tears that pour out like smoke then disappear.  These are the tears that are shed when you barely knew someone.  The second type of tears is d’ma-ot shel peirot, tears that enrich the earth and bear fruit.  These are the tears shed for someone who touched your life.

Max Neiden not only touched the lives of his family members, he touched the lives of all who came in contact with him.  Those of us who encountered Max felt connected to him whether we were young or old.  Those of us living in Lincoln and as well as those of us living in far away places felt as if our lives changed drastically when we heard that Max had died on Sunday.  I would like to suggest that the tears we shed upon hearing about Max’s death were tears that enrich the Earth and bear fruit.  By living with integrity,Max  taught us that strength of character can be shown through actions not words. He taught us that loyalty can be extended to loved ones and entire communities. He modeled that age need not diminish passion, that resiliency takes hard work and determination, and that feeling connected to others never ceases.  If anything, Max  taught us that although we are not in charge of the challenges that life presents us, we are in charge of the way in which we will react to those challenges. His quiet persistence and insistence on always living life to the fullest should serve as an example to all of us he leaves behind.

Debbie, Pinkie, Daniel, Gail, Sylvia, Bob, Randy, Dave, and Irene, Kevin, Brian, Evan, and Dora, Ivan, Mike, Larry, Sam, and Elaine, you all have varied memories of our beloved Max. And he loved you all very much. I know that by watching him when he was in your presence.  He not only added great meaning to your lives but you added a dimension of supreme joy to his life.  May those the memories of your times together continue to influence your lives and give you a sense that although he is no longer present physically with you, the bonds between you can never be broken, not even by death.  May you always be blessed with pleasant  memories to sustain you in the days to come and may Max’s soul be bound up with the bond of life. May we always be thankful that your life Max was one that left us with tears that enrich the earth and bear fruit.