December Dilemmas? Identity Issues.

This fall, our family took a trip to Italy where we spent several days going through art museums, looking at paintings and sculptures. Needless to say, there was an abundance of Church art to view. When we returned, my grand-daughter's art teacher asked what kind of art she had seen. She replied by saying she had seen many pictures of a guy hanging on a stick! Of course, as a 5 year old Jewish child, she had no idea that the man was Jesus nor that many in the world consider him their saviour.

This morning, when Christmas programming hit the airwaves, she was inundated with visions of Santa Claus and flying reindeer. She moved closer to me and asked me the following question, "Which do I like more, Santa or Chanukah? I explained to her that I don't even think about Santa because as a Jew that is not even part of my life. Chanukah is a holiday that has meaning to Jews.

If you look on the internet, you will see lists of things Jews can do on Christmas. Of course the proverbial, go to a movie and eat Chinese food are at the top of the list, followed by volunteer, and at the bottom of the list is go to shul and pray, because after all, Christmas falls on Shabbat this year!

There is another aspect to the December dilemma that is now effecting the American Jewish community. Fifty percent of all American Jews now marry non-Jews. Thirty-three percent of all American Jewish families are interfaith families as compared to 28% of all American Jewish families in 1990. Thirty-three percent of all intermarried couples in America raise their children to be Jewish. Of those interfaith families, 99% of them participate in Chanukah celebrations and 89% of them plan to participate in Christmas celebrations. The majority of those families try to prioritize Chanukah as the family's religious celebration, with 99% of them lighting candles in their homes. These same families, however, try to relate to Christmas in a secular way, going to the homes of their extended families to exchange gifts and participate in Christmas celebrations.
For thirty three percent of the Jewish families in America, it is really not an option to think that Christmas is not a part of their lives in some form, even if it is not in a religious manner.

So where does this leave us when Christmas falls on Shabbat? We should be emphasizing the fact that our primary obligation is to observe Shabbat. If we choose to gather together it should not be because there is nothing else to do, rather because we enjoy the opportunity to worship, eat, and commune with one another in the spirit of Shabbat. Similarly, if one's family members are celebrating Christmas, perhaps it is an opportunity to teach one's children that out of respect to one's own traditions, Shabbat will be observed in its usual manner and then the gatherings with extended family will take place.

Shabbat Shalom.