Sunday, November 23, 2014

In Memory of Marvin Krout z'l...Words Said Graveside by Nancy Coren



It is not simply the number of days that one lives that is significant.  Significance lies in the use that one makes of the hours that are granted in life.  It is to experience what life has to offer, both its sorrows and its joys, its frustrations and its accomplishments.

To become deeply involved in the lives of others, to give freely of one’s love and affection, to feel oneself loved and appreciated is to live wisely.  Then when one’s hour has come, one leaves behind a legacy of memories to be treasured by family and friends.

Marvin Krout’s life had significance to his family, friends, and community. He indeed lived wisely, although many of us here today are still reeling from his untimely death.

I can still see Marvin and Bunny surrounded by an entourage of children on their first visit to Tifereth Israel after having moved to Lincoln in 2002.  At that time, I was having difficulty realizing the many and varied connections he had to those surrounding him. What I learned as the years went on is that Marvin actually filled many roles in his family.  He was a loving husband, father, step-father, grandfather, and great-grandfather…and he played each role with great poise.  He made his blended family understand that no matter what, he was willing to “go out on a limb” for each and every one of them.  It is true that he devoted his life to his work and to the city of Lincoln, but it is also true that he was the role model of patience when he was at home.  We all know that lively families can be draining when one returns from a long day at work, but Marvin always remained steadfast in his commitment to “put out any proverbial fires” that started when he was away. He was extremely dedicated to Bunny and the family they raised together and most importantly, he was forgiving.

For many of us, Marvin’s demeanor was easy-going and joyful.  A smile always seemed to cross his lips, something I noticed even when he was lying in his coma in the hospital last week.  The sparkle in his eye reserved for his beloved family and his finely tuned, whacky sense of humor were part of his defining characteristics.

Bunny, I know that you will miss Marvin’s calming presence, his romantic nature, and his fierce loyalty to you.  He was indeed your champion. He believed in you and loved you deeply.  It is very difficult to lose a loved one who was your pillar of strength.  I believe you will however, find strength in the wonderful memories that he has left you.

Ben and Roo, you will not hear this hesped until you return from Thailand.  Your presence when Marvin suffered his stroke, did not go unnoticed.  Your caring and encouraging words and gentle touches let him know that your connection will never be severed. 

DeDee and Darry, your father gave you the greatest gift of all, a loving home in which to grow up. It might not have always been easy having an older father who had experienced “every trick in the book,” but I can assure you, that ability to be a peacemaker was probably a result of having seen the many ups and downs of life for himself, and realizing that life can indeed be okay. May your positive memories of him give you the strength to grow and prosper in a way that would have given him joy to watch.

Andrea and Adam, your lives became intertwined with Marvin’s life when he and your mom married in 1982. I have the sense that you appreciated Marvin’s patience with you and that in your own lives you have tried to emulate that sense of calmness with your own offspring.  Andrea, being present during a loved one’s final breath, is indeed life-changing.  I hope it leaves you with an inner sense of peace knowing that Marvin’s last moments were indeed without struggle.

Nava and Brynn, as Marvin’s grand-daughter and great-granddaughter, you held very special places in his heart.  Nava, I know Marv was the gentle male in your life who chose to make your life better.  He took you and your mom in when you had nothing, watched re-runs of the same movie over and over again with you until the VCR broke, helped you with your homework, was present for your first prom date. He had high expectations for you and watching you grow and develop gave him great joy!  Brynn, as you grow up, you will continue to hear stories about your great-grandfather, who always swooped you up and carried you proudly in his arms. His connection with you was beautiful to watch.

There are so many other family members whom I have not had the privilege to meet…Lonnie, Harlan, Shayna, Jennifer, Joshua, and Jordan. I hope the days ahead will find you comforted by knowing how deeply loved Marvin was by so many.

Marvin succeeded in transmitting his values and beliefs through his actions to the generations that have filled his home over the years.  His life has left an indelible mark on the lives of all those sitting here who will one day say with pride, “Marvin Krout, Mordechai Ben Leib v’Tillie, invested himself in his family and I am delighted that he chose to make that investment! It definitely enriched my life!”

Marvin, we will miss you, but we believe with the deepest of faith, that the life you lived so well, will continue to impact our lives.  For that we are thankful.

May your soul be bound up in the bond life.
Amen.

No comments:

Post a Comment