Love has been a theme in Jewish literature for thousands of years. There are stories about the love of men and women, the love between friends, and the love of G-d and the children of Israel. There are stories that point to the power of romantic love…Jacob sees Rachel at her father’s well, rolls the stone of the mouth of the well, waters her father’s flock, and then kisses her and breaks into tears. There are stories that speak about platonic love…Jonathan’s soul became bound up with the soul of David; Jonathan loved David as himself. And there are stories that address G-d’s love for Israel as seen through the redemption of the nation from bondage in Egypt and their possession of the promised land.
There are also many commandments related to love. We are told to love G-d, love your neighbor as yourself, and love the stranger in your midst.
There is an entire book of the Bible, the Song of Songs, devoted to the theme of love. Its imagery is sensuous and upon a first reading might seem like a modern day love story of unrequited love.
Why is there so much focus on love in our texts? Why is the topic an appropriate religious subject? Love is about giving and receiving. It actually mirrors the relationship we long for with G-d. It is not about feeding one’s own ego. It is about the meeting of two souls that nourish one another through unconditional acceptance of the other. Love is about having a relationship that is constant and eternal and not based on what the other person does for his/her partner.
In his book, Toward a Meaningful Life, Rabbi Menachem Mendel Schneerson wrote, “Love therefore is the foundation on which our entire world is built. All our laws, all our attitudes, all our interactions stem from the same principle. Love is the root of all civility and morality. Without love, it would be impossible to live in peace with one another, to respect one another’s needs, and to treat everyone with the same compassion that we would like to be given ourselves.”
We often speak about having a vision of a world in which all human beings will become united and recognize the oneness of G-d. Love is really about unity, a unity that brings meaning to life and makes the universe seem less chaotic because of the bonds that are able to bind two individuals together. In a unified relationship established through love, individuals do not start out the same nor do they become the same. True lovers are able to exhibit their own unique qualities and still feel as if they are one. Of course true lovers can also manage to disapprove of one another’s actions or words on occasion and still feel secure that they can accept each other unconditionally. Our world moves a little bit closer to that vision of a world that is united whenever two individuals who have love for one another live by the values of harmony, kindness, and goodness.
Love adds richness to our lives by making it possible to share one’s challenging times, sorrowful times, and joyous times. As Rabbi Sidney Greenberg wrote, “We are not meant to be separate and apart. We are meant to belong to one another, to reach out across the darkness, to huddle together in the cold, to hold hands in the slippery places, to skip together in the sunshine. Love blunts the sharp edge of sorrow, provides a handle for our burdens, adds richness to music, depth to beauty.”
For forty years I have been thankful for the deep love Charlie and I have felt for one another. It has indeed helped us to face life’s challenges with the knowledge that we can always depend upon each other for emotional support. We have been blessed because we have always been able to enjoy carrying out even life’s most mundane demands together. We have never been very good about planning for the future, but we have always been very good about enjoying, appreciating, and relishing each stage of our life together. We have worked hard to create a home based on loyalty, constancy, and caring. And we have discovered that the love we have for one another has left plenty of room in our hearts for our children and grandchildren and our friends. Our love has given us the power to laugh together, cry together, and share our deepest thoughts with one another without the fear of being rejected. Our love has made life meaningful. It has also made us recognize that unity and a shared purpose do not have to be a result of sameness. I thank G-d for having created us with the capacity to love and for the past 40 years which have flown by so quickly because it is just plain old pleasant to have your best friend by your side on this journey through life.
ברוך אתה ה' אלהינו מלך העולם, אשר ברא ששון ושמחה, חתן וכלה, גילה רינה, דיצה וחדווה, אהבה ואחווה, ושלום ורעות,
Blessed are you Adonai our G-d, King of the universe who created joy and gladness, groom and bride, mirth and song, delight and rejoicing, love and harmony, peace and companionship.
Amen.
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